If title of this post makes you nervous, you probably shouldn’t read it.
Or maybe you should.
Before we go any further, I’m going to have to ask you to place your publishing dreams in the box marked “misc” at the back of the room.
Be sure to leave all your unfinished queries and How to Get Published books & blogs and all those publishing-related inspirational quotes you taped to your bathroom mirror. Yes, even the quote that says J. K. Rowling was rejected twelve million times before becoming a kajillionaire.
Now pick up a blank notebook and a pen. We’re going old-school here. No laptops. No Internet. (Ironic, I know, considering where you’re reading this. Just work with me here.) I don’t want you to be distracted by anything but the breathable world and the clutter already in your head.
Everyone find an uncomfortable place to sit. Got one? Good. Now, I want you to spend the next few minutes doing this:
Nothing.
Your brain is going to need a few minutes of nothing to flush out the rest of that publishing dream. Because you’re still holding onto it, aren’t you. Of course you are. You’re hoping that after we wend our way through a forest of writerly wisdom we’ll break through into a clearing filled with purple wildflowers and clear blue skies and babbling brooks and talking rabbits who will reveal the Grand Secret to Getting Published!
Right.
Look, I know you’re still hanging onto the dream. I can see it in your eyes. You’ve got a virtual piece of it stuffed into the virtual small pocket in the front of your virtual jeans – the one inside the other pocket. [What’s the deal with that, anyway? A pocket within a pocket? It’s not like it’s going to fool anyone. “I searched her pockets, boss, and couldn’t find the USB drive with the computer files that could implicate us in crimes against humanity. Or the theft of millions of dollars. Or whatever the plot is.” “Really?” “Really. It’s not there, boss. I mean it.” “Did you check the pocket inside the pocket?” “Wait? There’s a pocket inside the pocket?” “You’re an idiot.”]
Distracting you? Why would I do that? What box? The box with your publishing dreams? Oh, I had my assistant send it to a warehouse for safekeeping. The one where they took the Ark of the Covenant in Indiana Jones. That one.
Forget about your publishing dreams.
Instead, do this: write the book you’ve always wanted to write. Or the book you know you were meant to write. Don’t write it for a demographic. Don’t write it to jump-start your writing career. Don’t write it because you’re sure you’re a better writer than Dan Brown. Don’t write it in hopes of becoming the next J. K. Rowling. Don’t write it for anyone but you.
Write it the way you want to write it. Use sentence fragments. Or run-on sentences. Write an epic. Write a novella. Verb all the words you want. Adverb to your heart’s content. Rules? There are no rules. There is just your novel.
Only yours.
Ready? Begin. I’ll just play Angry Birds on my iPhone while you write.
By the way, there are a lot of levels in Angry Birds.
[That’s it. This post is over. The box labeled “misc.” has been shipped to a fictional warehouse the size of the actual Rhode Island, which, granted, is really small for a state but really big for a warehouse. Just keep writing. I’ll be back. Don’t expect me to bring the talking rabbits.]
Comments
27 responses to “Give Up Your Publishing Dreams”
*yes*
*thanks*
Thanks for the freedom. I’ll take it.
It’s yours to keep. Enjoy it.
Permission to use run-ons and excessive adverbs?!?!? Throw in a comma-splice and I am IN!
seriously though.
WOOT!
Not only will I throw in a comma-splice, you can also have a prologue! I’m feeling generous today.
You know, I did that. Then I wrote another. Then I outlined another. And with each, I thought – this is the book I need to write NOW. I’m working on final revisions to the first (final haha) and thinking – I’m past this book. But I’m still going to finish it, because it’s still good (I think).
This is a funny post. You rock.
The path to the best book you’ll ever write is paved with the book you’re currently writing. [That quote sounds much better in the original Elvish language. Apologies for my average-at-best translation.]
Thanks. I’m so sick of seeing rules passed out by “experts,” and the “yes ma’am, thank you, ma’am” responses of new writers who think that’s the way to become a published writer.
I really believe that more than anything else, (smart) publishers are searching for confident, one-of-a-kind writers’ voices. While there is plenty of merit to the “rules,” it’s awful hard to find your own voice when you’re constantly questioning whether or not your voice is Publishing Approved.
This is the best advice there is. For writers anyway, not so much for surgeons or chefs. And the most amazing part? It works.
This is one of the best arguments for why I’m not a surgeon. Another argument: I’m deathly afraid of scalpels.
This is so very true. My two WIP’s, will never be sent out. I’m blogging why tomorrow.
But I’m positive you’ve said much of it so much more eloquently.
Oh, I don’t know if my thoughts are so eloquent. Maybe “eclectic” or “wanderly” or “happenstanceical.” But thanks anyway. I’ll go read your blogpost now.
Funny, i started to do that four years ago–write just what was on my heart in the way I wanted to write it. Got four novels contracted last year. more about to sell. I agree–stop trying to be like someone else. you have a unique perspective on whatever. Even talking rabbits. Not sure what that line merited a keyword tag, but, whatever… Thanks!
I’m all about the random keyword tags. It’s part of my unique perspective on whatever. Also? I just like making people wonder why I do it.
Thanks for the reminder that there are no rules except the ones we limit ourselves with. A breath of fresh air – I needed that!
Fresh air is good for the writer’s soul. It’s also good for the lungs. And life in general. It also tastes better than stale air.
What a relief.
But I haven’t let go of my dream. They’re still right here with me.
I know that the stuff I write is not ‘what the market needs’ nor is it ‘the next big thing’. But I continue to plod on, because I have nothing better to do.
Your posts are inspiring, even when they sound as though they are everything but.
Agreed.
Just so you know, Angry Birds just released a Halloween version today. Sorry/you’re welcome.
Great post! I’ve ripped out the inside pocket on all my jeans.
Oh, there is no grand secret to getting published. Just write the best book ever, and have the agents/editors/publishers fall in love with it and…
Ahem. No grand secret to writing, either. One has to sit and write. Not thinking about the dream right now. Thinking about the story.
Writing IS hard work. There should also be some good times with it too! 🙂
Yes, think about the story. The dream won’t mind.
I should thank you for the reminder of this freedom too 🙂
I think I have written the novel I was supposed to write, and had a blast writing and editing it.
Would you mind me linking to this post in my blog and adding you to my blogroll?
– Berit
Link and add to your heart’s content. Or maybe just shy of your heart’s content. It’s good to feel a little discontented. Helps with the writerly angst.
Ha ha, thanks a lot Steve. 🙂 You make us all smile and forget our writerly angst for a little while. 🙂